The Old Market – event listings From Jan

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The big push for the Spring is the #ReigningWomen programme, celebrating kick-ass women everywhere. The season has a variety of events-please keep them in this diary.


Jazz For Ukraine

Sunday 21 January, 15:00

Tickets £15, concessions £12

In the two years since the unprovoked invasion of their country, Ukrainians have astonished the world with their courage, resilience, and self-belief. Jazz for Ukraine is a celebration of this spirit, in solidarity and hope for Ukraine’s peaceful, independent future.

The concert presents leading jazz musicians from the UK and Europe, alongside local artists and young players, in a showcase of jazz music’s rising generation. Brighton & Hove Youth Big Band, the emerging jazz quintet Squint, and our headline act: the fabulous Ukrainian singer and composer Ganna Gryniva, in her first UK performance. 

 Jazz for Ukraine is in support of the charity War Child, which works in conflict zones across the world to provide children with access to professional psychological support. A representative from War Child will give a short presentation on their work in Ukraine to open our concert: an afternoon of wonderful live music, with an invitation to donate at the end. Do come along and support this wonderful event.

“Moving and powerful … magnificent playing and singing” – DFR Kultur Radio, on Ganna Gryniva 


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Daniel Martinez Flamenco: Andalucia

Sunday 28 January, 13:00, 16:30 and 20:00

Tickets £32 (advance)

The award-winning Daniel Martinez Flamenco Company presents its long-awaited 2nd production Andalucia, a stunning flamenco production accompanied by a chamber orchestra. 

This extra special concert is a musical representation of the eight regions that make up the autonomous community of Andalucia in the South of Spain, the birthplace of flamenco; Cordoba, Sevilla, Cadiz, Malaga, Jaen, Granada, Huelva and Almeria. Each region has their own distinct take on the many diverse styles that make up flamenco and these will be beautifully presented to the audience through Daniel’s guitar, and accompanied by an array of flamenco musicians, singers, a chamber orchestra ensemble and flamenco dance.

Unique, innovative, spellbinding and where the stunning beauty of classical music meets the passion and fire of flamenco. An unmissable flamenco experience! 

EDITOR NOTE: There are no review tickets available for this event


Gary Meikle

Tuesday 6 February, 19:30

Tickets £22.50

Gary Meikle returns to TOM in 2024! Here’s a quick word from the man himself…

“Heya guys, thanks for thinking about coming back again to watch me build up the show… so what can you expect? Well, I’m calling the show ‘Facts’ so you’ll hear lots of them and my take on them (obviously), but as usual it’ll be focused around my family life as a single papa and a dad to two girls that are in process of rinsing me for every penny I have for their upcoming weddings…” 

(TOM – Comedy)

Rocket Fuel Comedy: Sikisa, Alexandra Haddow, Bec Hill, Jen Brister

Wednesday 21 February, 20:00

Tickets from £13

Brush off the winter blues with an evening of cutting-edge comedy by the most exciting acts on the circuit. This special Reigning Women edition promises a laughter-filled evening of sky-rocketing talent – featuring Sikisa, Alexandra Haddow, Bec Hill and Jen Brister.

SIKISA: Three-time Leicester Comedy Festival nominee, and winner of BBC New Comedy Award, Sikisa has amassed an incredible credit list including Live at The Apollo, BBC New Comedy Award, Jonathan Ross’s Comedy Club, Sorry I Didn’t Know and the Stand Up Sketch Show, Comedy Central Live and Pie & A Pint.

“Uproariously hilarious” – Scotsman

ALEXANDRA HADDOW: One to watch, Alexandra’s hotly anticipated debut show, Not My Finest Hour, was nominated for Best Debut Show at Leicester Comedy Festival and sold out in its entirety at the Edinburgh Fringe 2023, including two extra shows.

“One of the most exciting new acts on the circuit” – Frankie Boyle

BEC HILL: With her unique style, Bec has a talent for incorporating arts and crafts into her stand-up routines, creating a unique and unforgettable comedy style that she calls “paper-puppetry”. Her one-liners regularly feature in ‘best joke’ lists by ‘reputable’ sources like The Telegraph, Dave, The Guardian, The Independent, Daily Record and Buzzfeed.

“Hill is a multicolour ray of eternal sunshine” – The Scotsman

JEN BRISTER: Critically acclaimed stand-up comedian and writer, Jen has been seen on BBC’s Live at the Apollo, Frankie Boyle’s New World Order, QI and Mock the Week.

“Furiously funny” – The Guardian

(Line-up printed in good faith but may be subject to change) 

EDITOR NOTE: There are no review tickets available for this event

(TOM – Spoken Word / Circus)

Naomi Wood: Gobbess

Thursday 22 February, 19:30

Tickets from £12.50

She doesn’t want to be a Goddess.

She wants to be a Gobbess.

Storytelling and poetry combine with aerial, circus and live music to tell a kaleidoscopic story of rage and becoming. This is one person’s search for lightness and depth amongst creativity and cat-calling.

Naomi Wood is a multi-disciplinary performance artist specialising in aerial arts and spoken word. She brings the two together to tell her personal story on the nature of creativity and identity, of queerness and self-expression in the social media age. Her work covers consent, the weirdness of human habit and why sometimes we should just embrace being rubbish.

Naomi has an MA in Creative and Critical writing from Sussex University and teaches creative writing workshops that empower people to perform their work onstage. As well as the show, Naomi will be providing a free creative writing workshop at TOM – full details for this are coming soon. 

(TOM – Theatre)

Jennifer Irons: Yukon Ho!

Thursday 29 February, 19:30

Tickets from £12.50

A funny, bizarre and (mostly) true guide to surviving a mad life in Canada’s frozen north.

Come to the Yukon! Cold, dark, and lonesome, with big animals, dubious men and dodgy liquor. Lots of liquor. Where there are more caribou than people, tossing chainsaws is sport and watching bears forage for garbage is considered a big night out. It’s where Intrepid Jen grew up and barely escaped.

Join her riotous cabaret-style survival guide and learn to quaff questionable cocktails, be Bear Aware and kick your way out of Canada’s frozen North with your mukluks on fire. Tragic, funny and bizarre, it’s all mostly true.

★★★★ “Fascinating, laugh-out-loud funny and surprisingly tender” – The List

“Beautifully complex… human and raw…” – Total Theatre 

(TOM – Comedy)

Vidura BR: French Kiss Tunnel

Friday 1 March, 19:30

Tickets £17.50

Vidura BR is a Sri Lankan comedian, writer, and director based in London, via Malaysia and Berlin. His dead-pan style puts audiences at ease while challenging conventional wisdom with a unique tone that is often irreverent, at times poignant, and always hysterical. Vidura’s got a new show. It’s about love and relationships and such. He does songs now too, please forgive him. 

(TOM – Comedy)

Joe Wells: King of the Autistics

Saturday 2 March, 19:30

Tickets £15

There are 700,000 autistic people in the UK but who is their leader? Two years ago, Joe Wells decided he should be ‘King of The Autistics’ and it all went horribly wrong.

The follow-up to the critically acclaimed I Am Autistic (available now on YouTube), this is a stand-up show about representation, role models and the fight for autistic rights. As seen on Rosie Jones’ Disability Comedy Extravaganza, BBC2’s Ouch! Storytelling Live and Channel 4’s Jokes Only a Neurodivergent Can Tell. Joe also has over 4.5m views online for his video ‘Having a non-autistic brother’. 

“One of my favourite comics” – Frankie Boyle

“Some of the most surprising and thought-provoking material coming from any comedian” – Guardian

★ ★ ★ ★ –

★ ★ ★ ★ –

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ – 

(TOM – Theatre)

Rosy Carrick: Musclebound

Sunday 3 March, 19:30

Tickets from £12.50

Confident, provocative and supremely powerful, Rosy Carrick is great at sex. In fact, her onstage career has long been based around her gleeful frankness on the subject. And yet, the sex she’s always been so open about – her sex life with men – is radically different from Rosy’s earliest and most private erotic fantasies, in which the musclebound heroes of movies like Conan and He-Man are publicly tortured and humiliated by their male antagonists, and where, alone with her imagination, sexual power means something very different. Now, newly single, forty and doling out relationship advice to a teenage daughter on the brink of her own first sexual encounter, Rosy is forced to confront the niggling suspicion that something about her sexual past has never felt quite right. Could reconnecting with the hyper-macho desires of her youth be the key to restoring her sexual power in the present? Or is there a more uncomfortable truth waiting to be reckoned with?

Recounting the hilariously obsessive real-life details of Rosy’s quest for sexual fulfilment alongside frank and intimate conversations with her daughter Olive and candid interviews with her childhood heroes Arnold Schwarzenegger and Dolph Lundgren, Musclebound leaps from the niche fetish of one individual woman into an important and long-overdue exploration of power, performance and the politics of pleasure in heterosexual sex, as Rosy is forced to ask herself: what are the sexual lessons we want to pass on to our daughters – and what do we still need to learn for ourselves?

“Perfectly poignant and profound… Musclebound drips with Carrick’s charisma and bursts with originality – an honest story of a woman and her adolescent daughter navigating the world of sex and desire” – The List

★★★★ “A startling, laugh out loud funny and erudite examination of age, relationships and female sexuality” – What’s on Stage

★★★★ “Intelligent, thought-provoking and witty – the whole audience was crying with laughter” – The Voice 

★★★★ “Rosy Carrick likes to touch herself” – London Theatre 

(TOM – Music / Spoken Word)

VIVID: A Reigning Women Celebration

Thursday 7 March, 19:30 (doors)

Tickets from £10

Introducing VIVID – the ultimate showcase of new talent you have to see before they break into the mainstream! This gig will feature loads of amazing artists including soul and R&B vocalist Scarlett Fae and spoken word artist AFLO. The Poet, as well as vocalist Kymara who will be performing live with her full band. Many more names are TBA – come and celebrate with us! 

(TOM – Comedy)

Simon Munnery’s Jerusalem

Friday 8 March, 20:00

Tickets £16

“One of the all time great British stand-ups” (Stewart Lee) performs a truly unique stand-up show.

Using William Blake’s poem (B-side to the English National Anthem) and The Fall’s take on it as a springboard, Simon endeavours to serve up satire, comedy and poetry with one eye on the distant past, and the other locked laser-like on the future. As he says, it’s clearly a recipe for disaster, but what’s wrong with that? Something will come of it and you can call it art.

“One of the all time great British stand-ups… A must see!!” – Stewart Lee

“A brilliant and subversive comedian” – The Guardian

★★★★★ “One of the finest gag-writers in the business” – The List 

(TOM – Spoken Word)

Hollie McNish: The Lobster Tour

Sunday 10 March, 19:30

Tickets £15

After a run of sold-out shows up and down the UK, Hollie McNish is back with a brand new book, Lobster and other things I’m learning to love. A Sunday Times bestselling writer whose live readings are not to be missed, expect strong language and adult content, gift-wrapped in gorgeously crafted poetry.

In Lobster, Hollie brings her much-loved style to questions of friendship, flags and newborns, clocks, cocks and volvos, shining a ridiculous and beautifully poetic lens upon all those things we have been taught to hate, and which we might just learn to love again. Support TBC. 

EDITOR NOTE: There are no review tickets available for this event

(TOM – Theatre / Spoken Word)

Jenny Foulds: Life Learnings of a Nonsensical Human

Thursday 14 March, 19:30

Tickets from £12.50

Life Learnings of a Nonsensical Human is an ode to the joy and complexities of friendship, queerness and raving. To the kindness of strangers, to the heartbreak of loss and missing and finding joy in the most unlikely places. These poems are for old ravers and fun makers, for anyone who has had a best friend. This is a love letter to the sticky floors that we have danced on for all these years.

Jenny Foulds (she/her) is a queer neurodiverse performance poet, writer and actress from Scotland. Jenny was the 2021 Scottish Poetry Slam Champion and was a World Slam Championships finalist in 2022, as well as being host and curator of the Brighton-based Spoken Word night Rebel Soapbox. She has had feature and headline gigs at nights across the UK including Hammer & Tongue, Loud Poets, Grooveverse, Stanza Poetry Festival, and Edinburgh Fringe.

As an actress, she was a series regular in Two Thousand Acres of Sky (BBC) and appeared in various TV and film roles including Rebus, Mandancin’, Taggart and The Debt Collector. She founded the street art blog Happy Graffiti, which later became a book published by Octopus Books (a Hachette imprint) in 2013. Life Learnings of a Nonsensical Human is her first solo show. 

(TOM – Dance)

Ceyda Tanc Dance: KIZLAR

Saturday 16 and Sunday 17 March, 19:30 daily

Tickets from £12.50

A celebration of what it means to be female, KIZLAR is an aesthetically driven exploration of femininity and masculinity, strength and vulnerability – a visually stunning dance work.

Ceyda Tanc Dance creates dynamic contemporary dance influenced by Tanc’s Turkish heritage. Drawing on the virtuoso movements of male Turkish dancers with an all-female company, their unique movement vocabulary combines athletic contemporary movement with traditional Turkish folk dance, conveying striking shapes and a strong, sensual energy. Tanc’s work seeks to challenge traditional gender representation and highlight the intersection of cultures in modern Britain, embedding themes of feminism, ritual and ceremony. 

(TOM – Comedy)

Jessica Fostekew: Mettle

Friday 22 March, 20:00

Tickets £17, concessions £15

A brand new show from the star of BBC’s QI, Live at the Apollo and C4’s Travel Man. Jess’ son has joined a cult and her cat’s learnt to talk, but despite all that, she’s fine actually. In fact, she’s hurtling faster and hustling harder than ever for the things that she wants and needs. 

Jess’ last show Wench played to a sold-out Edinburgh fringe run and UK tour (including a night right here at TOM) and is available now as a special. Her previous show Hench was nominated for Best Show at the Edinburgh Comedy Awards and the following year it won Best Show at the Chortle Awards where Jess also won Best Act. It’s available to stream as a special on Amazon Prime. 

Jess is a regular co-host of the Guilty Feminist podcast, host and creator of her own podcast about eating, Hoovering, and star and writer of BBC Radio 4’s Sturdy Girl Club. Jess has also appeared in the award-winning sitcom Motherland and most recently the hugely acclaimed feature film Scrapper which won the Grand Jury prize at this year’s Sundance Festival. 

She’s also been on all your favourite panel shows from Celebrity Pointless to House of Games.

★★★★ “A loud, lively and vital voice” – Evening Standard 

★★★★ “She wears her smarts on her sleeve” – Guardian 

★★★★ “She finds a new fiercely funny strain of comedy that’s her own” – Times 

EDITOR NOTE: There are no review tickets available for this event

(TOM – Comedy)

Nick Helm’s Super Fun Good Time Show

Friday 12 April, 20:00

Tickets £16,50, concessions £15

Nick Helm – the man with the golden larynx and greatest living all-round entertainer – is BACK!

After years and years of therapy, pills, personal growth and being a living legend the nation’s favourite Uncle and International Treasure-in-Waiting returns to the road to mesmerise a new generation of thrill seekers in his all new, brand new, box fresh show. Come and see your Golden Emperor shake his ass and give you the only thing you’ve ever wanted… the best damn night of your fragile lives. 

Since starting stand-up comedy in 2007, Nick quickly gained attention from across the industry for his unique, powerful and above all hilarious blend of one-liners, stories, poems and songs. His previous shows enjoyed sell-out runs at Edinburgh Fringe, and he has been twice nominated for the Edinburgh Comedy Awards. 

He has also released two successful albums, played lead roles in hit TV sitcoms Uncle and Loaded, fronted two of his own TV shows Eat Your Heart Out (Dave) and Nick Helm’s Heavy Entertainment (BBC), and was nominated for a BAFTA for short film Elephant, which he co-wrote, directed and starred in. As also seen on Live at the Apollo (BBC), 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown (Channel 4), The Reluctant Landlord (Sky) and many more. 

★★★★★ “Genuinely exciting” – Telegraph

★★★★ “Terrific” – Times

★★★★ “A true comedy daredevil” – Time Out 

EDITOR NOTE: There are no review tickets available for this event

(TOM – Comedy)

Laura Ramoso: The Sit Up Straight Tour

Tuesday 23 April, 19:30

Tickets £18.50

Character comedian Laura Ramoso invites you over for dinner with German Mom, Italian Dad, and more in this fast-paced, laugh-out-loud, tour de force. Just remember to keep your elbows off the table.

Laura Ramoso is a German-Italian comedian best known for her viral impressions on Instagram and TikTok. She has amassed close to 2 million followers with her hit characters “German Mom,” “Italian Dad,” and “Girl who just got back from…”. In 2022, she returned to the stage with her critically acclaimed live show, FRANCES. She performed an entirely sold-out run at the 2023 Edinburgh Fringe Festival and London’s Soho Theatre. Laura was named a 2023 Just for Laughs New Face of Comedy. Having grown up around the world due to her mum’s work with the World Health Organisation, Laura has a keen eye for picking up on cultural specificities that have a universal relatability.

“A stellar performer” – The Guardian

“Huge talent” – The Times

“…it’s hard not to be won over” – Time Out 

EDITOR NOTE: There are no review tickets available for this event

(Film / Talk)

Kendal Mountain Tour 2024: A Night of Adventure + Guest Speaker

Thursday 25 April, 19:30

Tickets £15, concessions £8.50

Prepare for an unforgettable night of adventure as the Kendal Mountain Tour 2024 comes to life!

Join us on a journey through the world’s most breathtaking landscapes with a selection of award-winning films showcasing the year’s most daring feats of courage and tales of human resilience. Whether you’re a seasoned explorer or simply someone who appreciates the majesty of nature, this tour promises to ignite your sense of adventure and leave you with a renewed appreciation for the planet we call home.

The films will be introduced by a member of the Kendal Mountain Presenting team. Alongside the collection of films, will be a talk from an incredible guest speaker – an explorer, activist or adventurer with a unique and inspiring story to share.

Get ready to be thrilled, inspired and moved at the Kendal Mountain Tour 2024 – where adventure begins at your doorstep… 

The full film programme is to be confirmed. See the Kendal Mountain Tour website for full details. 


Ute Lemper: Time Traveller

Friday 26 April, 19:30

Tickets £33

World-renowned chanteuse Ute Lemper makes a welcome return to TOM, performing songs from throughout her illustrious and celebrated career, including selections from her new album Time Traveller.

With a career spanning four decades, Ute is one of the world’s most exciting and respected performers having achieved success on the concert stage, Broadway, the West End and as an acclaimed recording artiste.

Known for her unsurpassed interpretations of Brecht and Weill, Ute is regarded as the premier interpreter of their works and continues to record the chanson of Brel and Piaf alongside multilingual material by Phillip Glass, Sondheim, Ferre, and Piazzolla. Lemper was the recipient of the coveted Olivier award for her role in Kander and Ebb’s Chicago where she played the role of Velma Kelly.

“She takes her place centre stage, and owns it” – The Guardian 

(TOM – Comedy)

MC Hammersmith: Straight Outta Brompton

Sunday 28 April, 19:30

Tickets £15

With over 20 million views online, MC Hammersmith is a multi-award-winning freestyle rap comedian. He is the world’s leading gangsta rapper to ever emerge from the ghetto of middle-class West London.

He presents an evening of improvised comedy raps based entirely on your suggestions. You’ll leave astounded at the speed of his brain, the spontaneity of his punchlines, and the stability of his upbringing.

Never the same show twice, surprise guests, and lightning-fast hip-hop comedy – it’s jaw-dropping, hilarious, and utterly unbelievable.

WINNER – Best Variety, 2020 Scottish Comedy Awards

WINNER – Best Newcomer, 2018 Scottish Comedy Awards

★★★★★ “The world’s leading freestyle rapper” – The Advertiser

★★★★★ “Turns stories into stomach-achingly funny raps as easily as breathing” – EdFringeReview 

★★★★★ “Tear streaming laughter” – Press and Journal 


Clinton Baptiste: Roller Ghoster!

Thursday 2 May, 19:30

Tickets £27.50

Solo again, Britain’s most celebrated clairvoyant medium psychic from Peter Kay’s Phoenix Nights returns with his brand new hilarious one-man stand-up show. As well as venturing into the audience to offer his unique spirit readings, Clinton Baptiste comes armed with more tales from his extraordinary childhood; exposing himself in ways you could never imagine – the family that shaped him, the narrow-minded who doubted him and the lovers that left him. He regales us with stories of his recent work on a cruise ship, his spirit readings round the UK and not to mention the day-to-day life with his Greenlandic spirit guide, Taruak. Brace yourselves – Clinton will prove his mystical ability once and for all. This time, he guarantees you WILL believe!*

(*No actual money back if you don’t. It’s not really a legal ‘guarantee’ as such. Look, it’s just an expression, okay?)

Laugh, gasp, scream your head off… but whatever you do… strap in and hold tight as Clinton takes you on a rip-roaring ride through the twists and turns of his heady life.

The premier hands-on clairvoyant, medium and psychic, Clinton is renowned as Britain’s foremost ‘can-do’ guru.

The self styled ‘Can-guru’.*

(*Not kangaroo.) 

EDITOR NOTE: There are no review tickets available for this event

(TOM – Comedy)

John Kearns: The Varnishing Days

Saturday 4 May, 19:30

Tickets £18.50

The Varnishing Days is the heart-stopping, glasses-dropping, hard-rocking, wig-shaking, levothyroxine-taking, knee-knocking, boot-licking, justifying, teeth-rattling, digressing new show from stand-up comedian to the stars John Kearns.

Go silent as I walk on! Acknowledge when something funny happens! Leave discussing dinner plans! Others will be implicated. Points will be circled and missed. Hell, it’s a man trying his best! When I visit your town dogs will start barking, as will clergy. Your microwave will go haywire. The lights in your vestibule will flicker and the Bank of England will nervously look at interest rates. On the day I write this, the pound has hit an all-time low against the dollar. Mark my words. This show will break that record again and again and again.

★★★★★ “The finest set of his career… what a show” – Brian Logan, The Guardian

★★★★★ – Steve Bennett, Chortle

★★★★★ – Jay Richardson, The List 

EDITOR NOTE: There are no review tickets available for this event



Sunday 2 June, 19:00 (doors)

Tickets £27.50 (advance)

British electronic band Blancmange are excited to announce their first-ever ‘Best Of’ Tour, celebrating 45 years since they first formed in 1979. The eleven-date tour will head to a string of major cities across the UK and include a show right here at The Old Market.

The tour is to be a celebration of a band who are willing to change and adapt new styles within their electronic framework, which was evident with last year’s critically acclaimed album Private View. 

Blancmange fuses together a delicate mix of synthesisers and surrealism, which over the years has created groundbreaking singles such as Feel Me, Living on the Ceiling, Blind Vision and Don’t Tell Me.

In their post-punk early days, Blancmange made tape loops and experimental sounds with kitchen utensils, before developing into one of the definitive chart-topping British electronic pop acts. Since reforming in 2011, Neil Arthur has harnessed a duality of experimentation and seamless pop melodies to release a staggering 10 albums in the last decade.

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